29 November 2009
for the MRI but I haven't heard from the "hospital of their choice" yet. I
canceled my Opthamologist appt and if I don't hear from the Hospital by Noon
Monday I will call them and demand they set me up ASAP! I am tired of having
bouts with headaches, nausea, vision problems, not being able to go out into the
sunlight due to light sensitivity, etc etc etc. When it comes to my health I am
not one to wait - unless of course there is a Holiday stuck in the midst of
stuff like there was.... I've learned to be pushy in my old timer years! OMG!
I was watching "The Jane Austen Book Club" and one character said she felt young
but would get depressed whenever she looked in the mirror so she decided that
unless she had to she stayed away from the mirrors. I feel like an extremely
thin 20 yr old so I am learning not to look in the mirror to see the plumper
version of her. As for putting on make-up, I pretend I am painting a picture
that isn't me!
20 November 2009
Well, yesterday, she went to the ASPCA to get "fixed." The girl is still all energy unless you put the cone on her, then she freezes with her head down or lays down, refuses to move and whimpers cuz she doesn't like it.
I am going to run an experiment and work on the computer for a while to see if my eyes start acting up, if they don't then I might consider calling and canceling the appointment. BUT I am still seeing double.
"Face Migraine = intense pain experience after the 5th or 6th repetition of slamming your face into Riley's fist, as a result of grabbing his throat from across the bar, after he has cut you off of alcoholic bevarages. It exists
Treatment = Gain intelligence." (Riley)
Or maybe I got smart. And I thought I was wearing too much black and blue make-up! LOL
16 November 2009
the last one is great!
Have you ever spoken and wished that you could
immediately take the words back..
Here are the Testimonials of a few people who did....
I walked into a hair salon with my husband and three kids in tow and asked loudly,
"How much do you charge for a shampoo and a blow job?"
I turned around and walked back out and never went back.
My husband didn't say a word...
he knew better.
I was at the golf store comparing different kinds of golf balls.
I was unhappy with the women's type I had been using.
After browsing for several minutes, I was approached by one of the good-looking gentlemen who works at the store.. He asked if he could help me.
Without thinking, I looked at him and said,
"I think I like playing with men's balls."
My sister and I were at the mall and passed by a store that sold a variety of candy and nuts.
As we were looking at the display case, the boy behind the counter asked if we needed any help.
I replied, "No, I'm just looking at your nuts."
My sister started to laugh hysterically.
The boy grinned, and I turned beet-red and walked away.
To this day, my sister has never let me forget.
While in line at the bank one afternoon, my toddler decided to release some pent-up energy and ran amok.
I was finally able to grab hold of her after receiving looks of disgust and annoyance from other patrons.
I told her that if she did not start behaving "right now" she would be punished.
To my horror, she looked me in the eye and said in a voice just as threatening,
"If you don't let me go right now, I will tell
Grandma that I saw you kissing Daddy's pee-pee last night!"
The silence was deafening after this enlightening exchange.
Even the tellers stopped what they were doing.
I mustered up the last of my dignity and walked out of the bank with my daughter in tow.
The last thing I heard as the door closed behind me, were screams of laughter.
Have you ever asked your child a question too many times?
My three-year-old son had a lot of problems with potty training and I was on him constantly
One day we stopped at Taco Bell for a quick lunch in between errands.
It was very busy, with a full dining room.
While enjoying my taco, I smelled something funny, so of course I checked my seven-month- old daughter, and she was clean.
Then I realized that Dannyhad not asked to go potty in a while.
I asked him if he needed to go, and he said "No".
I kept thinking "Oh Lord, that child has had an accident, and I don't have any clean clothes with me."
Then I said, "Danny, are you SURE you didn't have an accident?"
"No," he replied.
I just KNEW that he must have had an accident, because the smell was getting worse.
So, I asked one more time,
"Danny, did you have an accident?"
This time he jumped up, yanked down his pants, bent over, spread his cheeks and yelled
"SEE MOM, IT'S JUST FARTS!!"
While 30 people nearly choked to death on their tacos laughing, he calmly pulled up his pants and sat down.
An older couple made me feel better, thanking me for the best laugh they'd ever had!
BUT NOT LEAST TESTIMONY:
This one had most of the state of Michigan laughing for 2 days an d a very embarrassed female news anchor who will, in the future, likely think before she speaks.
What happens when you predict snow, but don't get any?
We had a female news anchor who, the day after it was supposed to have snowed and didn't, turned to the weatherman and asked:
"So Bob, where's that 8 inches you promised me last night?"
Not only did HE have to leave the set, but half the crew did too, they were laughing so hard!
didn't that feel good?
Pass it on to someone you know who needs a laugh,
we all say things we don't really mean,
so think before you speak.
15 November 2009
I have a large collection of candles which is great, unfortunately they were all scented and gave me a bad sinus headache the whole time but we had light! We had camping lanterns and head lights ,too, so we were set. Now I will start gathering unscented candles!!!! And battery operated lanterns so I don't have to wear the pimple head lamp!
We were on the end of the list to get fixed but we were so happy to get our electricity back Saturday night! Originally said it would be Sunday!
I know you can't tell it but that is an oak tree that fell across the street that almost blocked the entrance to our neighborhood!
And now for how I survived:
10 November 2009
09 November 2009
07 November 2009
06 November 2009
05 November 2009
02 November 2009
The mountain story was funny though there could have been a not so funny ending. I had bent over to get water into the bucket and slipped and my being a swimmer knew to dive. I had a flashlight with me so when I flashed the light in front of me I saw the ugliest mermaid dressed like me in front of me and we both screamed. She showed me the way to the top and I started swimming. Burton was on the shore calling for me to turn around I was swimming in the wrong direction. He managed to pull me out of the mud I was stuck in and immediatedly I began to pull coat and clothes off and running up the hill towards the "Faerie Cottage." (Yes, my friend built a faerie cottage as a refuge from the world the world.) My husband chased me grabbing clothes (good thing it was dark as sin outside - that is until we got inside and he had lit the lanterns) then began chasing me around the room trying to help dry me off. No easy task because I was running trying to keep the blood moving thus warming me up and we were laughing so hard. I eventually got dried, jammied, and laid on the floor with my feet near the camping lattern to get warm... yes, and I got an occasional burn.
Here I am trying to dry my pond gunk laidened hair beneath a wall lantern.
The beautiful do!
The next day my friend Gwen came by and picked me up, she wanted to show me a really pretty place she loves to go to (she forgot it was winter and all the flowers were gone.) Anyways we drove around a bend and suddenly I was attacked by a bad tree: it hit me square in the forehead! From Gwen's point of view it looked like the branch went into my eye. She shoved me back then hit reverse on the 'Gator. Realizing my eyes (except for for third eye were okay) she jumped out of the jeep, picked up a huge branch and screaming "Bad tree! Baaaaad tree!" and was beating on the branch until it broke. That branch then fell and bounced back up and popped her in the chin! The clean version of what she said was "Man that tree has bad charma!"
This year I am doing Nano Wrimo translated National Novel Writing Month. I went to the Kick off party and one of the ladies made"Plot Bunnies" whose job is to help us when we got stuck or things just didn't seem to be going in the right direction. I got a plot bunny with only one eye: the third eye so I got my Cyclopes back! I named her "Cy."
I've also been out searching for a neighbor who has alzheimer's who escaped from the house on evening about 10, someone in a neighborhood about a mile down the road found him), chasing down runaway dogs who are of the spastic kind, and now we have a new foster dog who has more energy that has more energy than a Tazmanian Daredevil! Last night she was playing with D.C. (the cat who thinks he is a dog) who isn't quite sure of what to make of "Ginger." Ginger chased her into a corner in my bedroom which was no big deal until Misty (our female cat) saw Ginger had D.C. cornered and she tore after that puppy!(This was an all time first: Misty protecting her brother insteed of slapping him around!) In trying to get away from Misty Ginger ran into the closet - stupid move because there is no way out! Misty tore after her and there was a "WWW" going on and Ginger was screaming for pure mercy! B-man and I got Misty off the dog who took off down the hall. B-man had the cat by the neck skin wand was giving her a lecture while shaking her and hollering NO! We were a little stumped because normally the situation is the other way around and when cornered Misty usually just gave the dog a good squat which sends the dog running. Well, you would think that would be the end of it but Ginger is a few light bulbs short of having one and went back into the bedroom looking for D.C. We fianlly had to crate her to keep her from getting whooped up worse, obviously Misty was in 'that kind of mood.'
You ask why is this dog short a few light bulbs of having one... Ginger barks at her reflection in any window, she barks at my reflection in any window, add the closet free for all and you have it. And we have only had her since Friday evening.
Well, that is all to tell at this particular moment but that could change. Keep an eye on my blog www.aheartofmersea.blogspot.com, I have been adding all kinds of pictures and an occassional story.