28 August 2010

Wow, where did the time go? It sure is slippery!

Today is my birthday - 54! I've made it this far and still have some life yet to experience!




"Celebrating Life Not Numbers!"

23 August 2010

How to give cat a pill

How to Give a Cat a Pill

1. Pick up cat and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby.


Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cats mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. As cat opens mouth, pop pill into mouth.

Allow cat to close mouth and swallow.


2.
  Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa.

 

Cradle cat in left arm and repeat process.


3.
  Retrieve cat from bedroom, and throw soggy pill away.




4.
  Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm, holding rear paws tightly with left hand.

Force jaws open and push pill to back of mouth with right forefinger. Hold mouth shut for a count of ten.


5.
  Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe.





Call spouse in from the garden.

6.  Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, hold front and rear paws.

Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold head firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into mouth. Drop pill down ruler and rub cat's throat vigorously.


7.  Retrieve cat from curtain rail.

Get another pill from foil wrap. Make note to buy new ruler and repair curtains. Carefully sweep shattered figurines and vases from hearth and set to one side for gluing later.

8.  Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with head just visible from below armpit.



Put pill in end of drinking straw, force mouth open with pencil and blow down drinking straw 
9.  Check label to make sure pill not harmful to humans and drink one beer to take taste away. Apply band-aid to spouse's forearm and remove blood from carpet with cold water and soap.




10.  Retrieve cat from neighbor's shed.


Get another pill.  Open another beer.  Place cat in cupboard, and close door onto neck, to leave head showing. Force mouth open with dessert spoon. Flick pill down throat with elastic band.
 

11. 
Fetch screwdriver from garage and put cupboard door back on hinges. Drink beer. Fetch bottle of scotch. Pour shot, drink.

Apply cold compress to cheek and check records for date of last tetanus shot. Apply whiskey compress to cheek to disinfect. Toss back another shot. Throw tee-shirt away and fetch new one from bedroom.

12.  Call fire department to retrieve the damn cat from the top of the tree across the road.  Apologize to neighbor who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid cat.



Take last pill from foil wrap. 

13.
  Using heavy-duty pruning gloves from shed, tie the little *&#%^'s front paws to rear paws with garden twine and bind tightly to leg of dining table.  Push pill into mouth followed by large piece of filet steak. Be rough about it.  Hold head vertically and pour two pints of water down throat to wash pill down.

14. Consume remainder of scotch.  Get spouse to drive you to the emergency room.  Sit quietly while doctor stitches fingers and forearm and removes pill remnants from right eye. Call furniture shop on way home to order new table.




How To Give A Dog A Pill

1.  Wrap it in bacon.

2.  Toss it in the air.



22 August 2010

Dr Oz on Fibromyalgia!

Mehmet Oz
Photo: Ben Goldstein/Studio D
Dr. Oz will see you now! In his first O column, he analyzes the different treatments for fibromyalgia.


Defining Fibromyalgia: Though classified as a disorder of the musculoskeletal system, the condition is now seen as a central nervous system problem. Symptoms include increased sensitivity to pain, achy and stiff joints, fatigue, and specific tender points on the back, chest, arms, and legs. Migraines, sleep disorders, and irritable bowel syndrome are also common complaints. Up to 3 percent of the population may suffer from fibromyalgia, but with no clear cause, the condition is difficult to diagnose.

Western Medicine Approach: A formal diagnosis for fibromyalgia didn't exist until 1990, but now there are three FDA-approved meds to combat the pain. Still, says Nancy Klimas, MD, director of the Allergy and Immunology Clinic at the University of Miami, "there is much more to treatment than a pill." Strategies are needed to improve sleep, stretch and restore symmetry to muscles that have been shortened by spasm, and raise overall conditioning through exercise.

Energy-Based Approach: Practitioners believe the root of fibromyalgia is a disturbance in nerves that blocks energy. The disturbance, says Devi S. Nambudripad, MD, PhD, and a licensed acupuncturist, is caused by sensitivities to substances ranging from pollen to vaccines to chemical agents in fabrics. Anxiety and
depression may also play a part. Practitioners use acupuncture to release energy and allergy testing to identify problem substances.

Psychological Approach: "The pain of fibromyalgia is not caused by depression," says Leonard Jason, PhD, professor of psychology at DePaul University, "but depression can deepen a patient's experience of pain." Mental health professionals may play a complementary role in treatment, but it's a vital one. Cognitive behavioral therapy can relieve depression and help patients identify sources of stress that magnify their symptoms.

Nutrition-Based Approach: Fibromyalgia is a systemwide breakdown, says Jacob Teitelbaum, MD, medical director of the nationwide Fibromyalgia & Fatigue Centers. After suffering from the disease in the 1970s, he developed his own protocol; in studies, patients improved by as much as 91 percent. He recommends supplements to help sufferers sleep, balance hormones, boost immunity, and improve nutrition. He also prescribes regular exercise. (Try Dr. Oz's 20-minute workout plan)

My Recommendation: Because Western medicine was slow to accept fibromyalgia, it is behind in its work; this is an area where patients will want to take a serious look at alternative approaches. Energy-based medicine could offer some important advances in treatment over the next decade, but since it has yet to be tested by independent research, I think it's premature to base your therapy solely on this approach. I'm more impressed by Teitelbaum's supplement regimen, and not only because he has tested his theories: I've put patients on this program with very good results. I would add counseling, as it should always be a part of fibromyalgia treatment. If after a couple of months you don't see improvement, talk to your doctor about drug therapy.

18 August 2010

Sometimes I wonder if it is worth it.

I am a journaler, one who write her thoughts, feelings, deeds, descriptions, fears, loves, and other things in a paper book. A paper journal no one ever reads unless I allow them, it is not there for anyone and I do not expect anyone to sign a guest book stating "Hey, I read your journal! Hmmmmmmmm....." LOL 

I am also a Blogger, one who posts thoughts, some feelings, jokes, pictures, things that happen that aren't too personal because I know someone might sign a guest book saying "Hey, I read your blog, loved it!" or " Are you crazy? LOL"  I like to post pictures and things to help others feel good, happy, see life is a good thing, and on occasion  a heartfelt post of feeling lousy so  people can see that I am also aware of how hard life is at times.


Well, this is one of those times I am feeling 'hmmmmmmm,' why do I post here, no one reads my Blog. I guess it must be that there are times when I need encouragement I guess so I can go back and get encouraged by reading my own posts. I believe people should encourage themselves because there are plenty of times in life when there are no others to do it. Am I right?

Ahhhh the good ole days!

How's This For Nostalgia?

All the girls had ugly gym uniforms?

http://www.pbase.com/donboyd/memories_doyouremember

It took three minutes for the TV to warm up?

http://williamsager.files.wordpress.com/2008/03/old-tv-set.jpg


Nobody owned a purebred dog?

http://dogtime.com/system/shelter/02/63/92/37/rufus-mutt-dog-picture-thumb.jpg

When a quarter was a decent allowance?

http://www.coinstudy.com/images/1955-quarter-top.gif

You'd reach into a muddy gutter for a penny?

http://coins.thefuntimesguide.com/images/blogs/1955-doubled-die-penny.png

Your Mom wore nylons that came in two pieces?

Opaque 
Thigh Highs with Lace Top

You got your windshield cleaned, oil checked, and gas pumped, without asking, all for free, every time? And you didn't pay for air? And, you got trading stamps to boot?

http://www.dizzypigbbq.com/images/CompetitionPics/20Jack05/2TennesseeGasStation.jpg
Laundry detergent had free glasses, dishes or towels hidden inside the box?

http://i.ebayimg.com/14/!BiYfh5g!2k~$(KGrHqMH-DsEsMi7PV-rBLOo-JD!!Q~~_35.JPG

It was considered a great privilege to be taken out to dinner at a real restaurant with your parents?

http://homepage.mac.com/dorlando/.Pictures/AMG_Blog_Photos/car_hops_book.jpg

They

threatened to keep kids back a grade if they failed. . and they did it!

http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_gFkopAM5g0s/SZG17CLL1fI/AAAAAAAAAio/ucJLys1Ug8g/s400/n587691767_1110864_2906.jpg

When a 57 Chevy was everyone's dream car...to cruise, peel out, lay rubber or watch submarine races, and people went steady?

http://ultimateperformancecar.com/BlogImages/57Chevy2.jpg
No one ever asked where the car keys were because they were always in the car, in the ignition, and the doors were never

locked?

http://www.swclassiccars.com/images/parts/5/DSCN0408.JPG

Lying on your back in the grass with your friends?
and saying things like, 'That cloud looks like a... '?

http://thefuntimesguide.com/images/blogs/love-heart-cloud.jpg
Playing baseball with no adults to help kids with the rules of the game?

http://www.strongmuseum.org/blogs/wp-content/uploads/2009/01/stickball.jpg

Stuff from the store came without safety caps and hermetic seals because no one had yet tried to poison a perfect stranger?

http://img1.eyefetch.com/Portfolio%5CTheresaPotgieter%5C108883.jpg

And with all our progress, don't you just wish, just once, you could slip back in time and savor the slower pace, and share it with the children of today.

http://www.mentalfloss.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/08/435_porch9.jpg

When being sent to the principal's office was nothing compared to the fate that awaited the student at home?

http://www.rbhsclass1958.com/Remember%20When/Principals%20office.jpg
Basically we were in fear for our lives, but it wasn't because of drive-by shootings, drugs, gangs, etc. Our parents and grandparents were a much bigger threat! But we survived because their love was greater than the threat.

http://www.grimshaworigin.org/images/NorthAmerica/AnnaSehnertAndGrandchildren1.jpg
. .as well as summers filled with bike rides, Hula Hoops, and visits to the pool, and eating Kool-Aid powder with

http://blog.al.com/finaltaxi/2008/01/large_Hula-Hoop_1958a.jpg
sugar.
Didn't that feel good, just to go back and say, 'Yeah, I remember that'?


http://collection.movingimage.us/media/mmi/images/3/5/38936_object_representations_media_3541_medium.jpg
I am sharing this with you today because it ended with a Double Dog Dare to pass it on. To remember what a Double Dog Dare is, read on And remember that the perfect age is somewhere between old enough to know better and too young to care.


Send this on to someone who can still
remember Howdy Doody





and
The Peanut Gallery, the Lone Ranger, The Shadow knows, Nellie Bell , Roy and Dale, Trigger and Buttermilk.
http://chud.com/articles/content_images/5/The%20Lone%20Rangerjpg

How Many Of These Do You Remember?

Candy cigarettes

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_JnFLyVDFcgA/RkYHxs7RERI/AAAAAAAAAAk/kTxUlQGvFKk/s320/candy-cigarettes.jpg
Wax Coke-shaped bottles with colored sugar water inside.

http://prospectknights75.org/images/used/jw104.jpg

Soda pop machines that dispensed glass bottles.


Coffee shops with Table Side Jukeboxes.


Blackjack, Clove and Teaberry chewing gum.

http://www.oldsweetsong.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/03/clove.jpgError! Filename not specified.
Home milk delivery in glass bottles with cardboard stoppers.

http://www.mcclatchy1958.com/images/home_delivery_of_glass_bottles_with_cardboard_stoppers_250x250.jpg

Newsreels before the movie.

http://www.baltimoresun.com/media/photo/2010-01/51540773.jpg
Telephone numbers with a word prefix...( Yukon 2-601) Party lines.

http://blogs.premierstudios.com/files/2009/07/old-phone.jpg

Peashooters.
 
http://lauriekendrick.files.wordpress.com/2010/01/pea-shooters.jpg


Hi-Fi's & 45 RPM records.

http://www.solcomhouse.com/images/45rpm.jpg

78 RPM records!

http://m.b5z.net/i/u/1608444/i/DSC04025_ezr.jpg

Green Stamps
.
http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_ZTt7ivF2m-0/RqeoHe_XLiI/AAAAAAAAAKA/z_UcroeOWgY/s400/S-and-H-Green-Stamps.jpg

Mimeograph paper.

http://whatitslikeontheinside.com/uploaded_images/mimeograph-788411...jpg
The Fort Apache Play Set.

http://www.mardecortesbaja.com/FtApacheFull.jpg
Do You Remember a Time When

Decisions were made by going
'eeny-meeny-miney-moe'?
Mistakes were corrected by simply exclaiming, 'Do Over!'?
'Race issue' meant arguing about who ran the fastest?

http://blog.timesunion.com/storyofalbany/files/2009/11/The-Bubniak-Kids-95-Lancaster-St-300x260.jpg

Catching The Fireflies Could Happily Occupy An Entire Evening?


http://i.pbase.com/g6/33/609933/2/81647188.5UO8ESDy.jpg

It wasn't odd to have two or three 'Best

Friends'?

http://www.fotothing.com/photos/85c/85c9ece57e474288ccaffb59153cdac4_e82.jpg


Having a Weapon in School meant being caught with a Slingshot?

http://www.jeffersongeneralstore.com/Shop/images/SlingShot.jpg
Saturday morning cartoons weren't 30-minute commercials for action figures?

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_KCcb6Da-GUM/SC6C5nZ6crI/AAAAAAAAAV4/-BnJl8e1qmI/s400/OldBugsBunny.jpg

'Oly-oly-oxen-free' made perfect sense?

http://pimpedfiction.files.wordpress.com/2007/07/hide_and_seek.jpg
Spinning around, getting dizzy, and falling down was cause for giggles?

 
http://farm1.static.flickr.com/26/99001476_a3abc44948.jpg


The Worst Embarrassment was being picked last for a team?

http://www.montesano60s.com/pictures/past_present/mustangs_baseball_pic.jpg
War was a card game?

http://www.themagictricksblog.com/pictures/bicycle_playing_cards.jpg

Baseball cards in the spokes transformed any bike into a motorcycle?

http://www.fhs1961.com/youth86.jpg
Taking drugs meant orange - flavored chewable aspirin?

http://www.drug3k.com/img2/aspirin_12830_5_(big)_.jpg

Water balloons were the ultimate weapon?

http://www.bestchurchofgod.org/.god/uploads/Image/KidzKorner-Krafts/water-balloons.jpg

If you can remember most or all of these, Then You Have Lived!!!!!!!


Pass this on to anyone who may need a break from their 'Grown-Up' Life . .

I Double-Dog-Dare-Ya!
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